Recently, I uploaded this video on a shortened version of my own personal story with abortion:
Let me fill in some observations that the video did not cover, or go into enough detail:
I found out that my girlfriend may have been pregnant when she called me one evening when I was studying for a test. I was a freshman at the University of Arizona (UA) and was living right off campus in a small studio apartment, within easy walking distance.
By this time, my girlfriend, Lisa, had moved to Dallas, Texas, because her dad had got another job or a promotion from his old job which necessitated a move from Tucson to Dallas. We had been dating for about two years at this point. She was still living with her parents at this time.
During this phone call, Lisa mentioned that she had missed her period. My head was not in the conversation because I did not respond in the way she wanted; I sort of brushed off this news and did not respond as I should have. She knew me well enough that my answer meant that I did not really hear what she had just said and my mind was somewhere else; she was right because I had to study for this exam or test coming up and my mind was focused on that.
She said it more emphatically: “Roy, I missed my period.” Her tone snapped me out of my fog and I instantly realized what she was trying to tell me: she might be pregnant. I was stunned.
We discussed what she should do next, and I suggested she go to her local drug store and purchase a home pregnancy test and call me back with the results. She agreed to this plan and we ended the conversation.
When she called me back, she confirmed the worst: she was pregnant. My world collapsed under my feet and I was stunned at this news. What in the world were we going to do?
In 1979, information on abortion was not as easily available as it is today; there was no internet, Google search machines, cell phones, or personal computers that one could use to instantly discover all the information on abortion that one would need to make an informed, intelligent decision. But I did have a conscience, and it told me that aborting this child was not the right thing to do.
My girlfriend wanted nothing to do with our baby. Her only thought was getting rid of it, to keep the shame of her pregnancy from her mother. She said to me, “My mom will never find out about this.” We discussed no other option because she refused to consider any other path than one of death and destruction.
I would have married her, quit school, and done whatever was necessary to raise my family. But again, such an option was not considered because it was all about what Lisa wanted…not me or our baby.
And being in an impossibly difficult position, I meekly went ahead with her decision, following her lead like a lamb to the slaughter, offering no arguments to the contrary. What could I do? Women hold all the cards when it comes to abortion and a man’s opinion is, for the most part, not given serious consideration. At least this was true in my case.
Being a typical university student back then, I was broke, so much, in fact, that I reduced myself to selling my own plasma. I worked your typical college job, nothing special to try and make ends meet, but I had no expendable income for an abortion. I borrowed the money from a friend.
This same friend and I drove together to Dallas. I met Lisa and we went to a Planned Parenthood where the abortion was done. Not many months after, she and I went our separate ways and never talked about what happened until decades later when I looked her up. That’s another part of this sad story…
Did I feel relieved afterwards? Yes, I did. It was like a giant weight lifted from my shoulders, but reality would set in several years later, in 1983, when I was sitting in a church service where the first pro-life movie, Assignment Life, to ever show an actual abortion was shown. It was the first time my eyes saw such a thing and I was floored, dumbfounded, like the scales were suddenly ripped from my eyes and I saw what I had participated in those few years prior.
Overwhelmed with grief, I cried; it hit me like a fist in the gut. This is what abortion truly was? What had I done? It was a brutal eye opening experience that would literally alter the course of my life.
I began reading and studying about the true nature of abortion, its history, the legislative process that brought abortion on demand to the country, and the effects it had on both men and women. Ten years after the legalization of abortion in America, there was tremendous opposition to the landmark decision, Roe. v. Wade, that forced abortion down the throats of all Americans.
One of the books I read which had a profound impact on my life was written by George Grant, a Christian, pro-life author. Titled “Grand Illusions: The Legacy of Planned Parenthood” and written in 1988, it was instrumental in revealing how evil this abortion giant truly is, planting a seed in my life that grew into a mature tree of ongoing activism against them.
Here it is in PDF format for free:
Pro-life clinics called “Crisis Pregnancy Centers” began springing up all across the nation as Christians across the denominational spectrum became involved in the fight for life. I volunteered to speak in various high-schools and present the pro-life message. Yes, you could actually do that back in the middle to late 1980’s, but I’m not sure such a message would be tolerated today.
I began to picket in front of a notorious abortion doctor here in Tucson—Scott Ricke (full name P. Scott Ricke). Like so many other professional, medically trained serial killers who earn their livings decapitating, disemboweling, and dismembering innocent and defenseless pre-born humans, Ricke perfectly fit the description of a true scumbag. This link will introduce you to him: https://clinicquotes.com/abortion-provider-p-scott-ricke/
I also went downtown to a Planned Parenthood clinic that at one time performed abortions and tried to persuade abortion minded mom’s and dad’s to keep their children.
But my favorite venues for reaching out to people with the pro-life message were on university campuses. This made sense as well, for the greatest percentage of women who walk into abortion clinics are unmarried and in their 20’s: https://abort73.com/abortion_facts/us_abortion_statistics/
And what better place to reach this age group than on a university or college campus known to be “marketplaces of ideas” and where free speech—at least at one time—is supposed to be honored and respected?
One of the most effective pro-life platforms for reaching university/college aged students is the “Genocide Awareness Project (GAP)” which is part of the “Center for Bioethical Reform (CBR)”. CBR has an outstanding website that everyone interested in pro-life outreach and education should visit: https://www.abortionno.org/
I traveled with GAP for about two and half years, visiting different university and college campuses. Here is a Youtube video I made of some of these trips:
Update: (Oct. 29, 2021) I am in my early sixties now. Forty two years have passed since that fateful day when I met Lisa at that Planned Parenthood in Dallas, Texas. Over 4 decades. It simply does not seem possible that this horrible event actually occurred in my life.
My son or daughter would be approximately 41 years old today. I would probably have grandkids from my son or daughter, perhaps great grandkids even.
The tragedy of what I participated in so many years ago—that horrific abortion—still affects my life to this day. Who can possibly tell how different my life would now be if Lisa and I had decided to “choose life” for our innocent baby. How different would Lisa’s life be today?
How would she think today if she had that son or daughter, now 41 years old, in her life? Would she look back with absolute regret and terror at what she was intent on doing over 40 years ago if she was holding in her arms a great grandchild from the now grown son or daughter she was focused on killing, if she had chosen life for our baby instead of executing him or her? I certainly think she would.
As I mentioned above, at the time of the abortion, I felt relief, like the weight of the world had dropped off my shoulders. But that cannot compare to the decades of regret and guilt that I have carried with me since that day when I sat in church and watched that pro-life movie that the Lord used to open my eyes to the heinous crime that I had participated in. That little bit of temporary relief is dwarfed by the many long years that I have had to deal with since then.
And I know, of course, that I will have to face my aborted son or daughter one day. What will that be like? Will the Lord reveal to me what would have happened if Lisa and I had chosen life for our baby? Will I see the life and lives that never was and were allowed to be? What will my son or daughter say to me, or the grandchildren or great grandchildren that never had a chance to live and experience life due to our selfishness?
How I wish we would have chosen life for our baby.